You would think with all that money, Francisco Lindor would have someone on the payroll to write a better story than the ratatouille he cooked up for the media Friday night. And you would think with all that money, Steve Cohen would invest in top-shelf pest control. Breaking news. Turns out that rat/raccoon/possum was a rat. It was Bob “Betamethasone” Baffert.
Our sinking ship was pirated by Pittsburgh on Sunday. Bucs return home to host the Joey Votto-less Reds. Cincy’s Jeff Hoffman (2-2, ERA 4.39) was hit up for four runs in two innings by the White Sox last out. The Pirates’ Mitch Keller (2-3, ERA 6.29) enters off his best start of the year, shutting out San Diego for 5 ²/₃ innings. Bursting with confidence we will halfheartedly back Pirates for 10 units.
Mother’s Day Singalong! … Mama! Ooohhh! I don’t want to die (it’s only May), sometimes wish this season was never born at all! … Kyle Hendricks did what all pitchers we pick do. Spotted the Pirates six runs before the Cubs mounted a furious comeback only to fall short 6-5. Rats! Down -1,424 ratajkowskis.
