Just as James T. Kirk never said, "Beam me up, Scotty," and Darth Vader never said, "Luke, I am your father," Detective Joe Friday never uttered the famous catchphrase, "Just the facts, ma'am." The actual line took two forms: "All we want are the facts, ma'am" and "All we know are the facts, ma'am."
Although fans of classic television no doubt clearly recall Jack Webb's stalwart detective imploring a meandering witness to get on with her statement with the famous phrase, they need not worry that they've slipped into an alternate timeline. Like "Beam me up, Scotty," "Just the facts, ma'am," as reported by the professional fact checkers at Snopes, stems from a combination of faulty memories, pop cultural appropriation, and simple rephrasing of a real line of dialogue.
According to Michael J. Hayde, author of "My Name's Friday: The Unauthorized but True Story of Dragnet and the Films of Jack Webb," the phrase entered the lexicon thanks to a pair of comedy sketches from comedian Stan Freberg. "St. George and the Dragonet" with the B-side "Little Blue Riding Hood" was released to radio 1953. "Dragnet"-inspired parodies of the legend of St. George and the dragon and the classic fairytale delivered in Joe Friday's famous monotone, the single was an immediate success. On the record, Freberg says, "I just want to get the facts, ma'am." The phrase was truncated in the popular imagination, and from that point on, became an indelible part of the show's legacy.
